“Comedy, like sodomy, is an unnatural act,” once stated bug-eyed comedian Marty Feldman.

So why not make things easy on yourself; simply steal comedy material. Yes, become a humor-thief!  Much like ripping-off a car, stealing jokes has no consequences………if you don’t get caught! Some comedians make entire careers doing just that. It worked for such comedy giants as Carlos Mencia, Dane Cook, or old-timey Milton Berle, who was known for having the biggest “shlong” in Hollywood. They must have done something right!

Good question? I—your trusty Freedom Hater have gone to great lengths to find out.

Why can’t we get all sauced up and then fire off some heat? It's our Constitutional right to shoot while shitfaced. 

Here’s where you can go to do such and what you can to do once you get there.

Remember, be sure to have some breath mints beforehand.

 

Besides loving Jerry Lewis, the French love their miming. This delightful art de Francias has brought pure happiness to millions-perhaps even billions! Now it's your very own chance to learn this craft. 

THINGS NEEDED:

-1 beret

-White mime face paint

-An imaginary box to be trapped in.

-Imaginary wind to walk against

-An imaginary ladder to climb

-An imaginary rope to play tug-of-war with

-A good pair of running shoes to escape angry mobs of mime-haters

 So you want to be a mime, but you just don't know how. Maybe your goal in life is to be the next Marcel Marceau

Here's what you do...................

Hey Freedom Haters! Some of you might be consider taking a road trip this 4th of July weekend. And we think that's great! 

But what if you've depleted your case of Red Bull and think you're still good to drive another 350-375 miles of road?

Then what?  Take precautions and look for the signs to determine that you might be too tired to carry on.

Freedom Haters has a few astute signals of road fatigue.