Our weekly explanation of things from last century. 

Facebook privacy? Punching women on MTV? It's Pikachu Goddamnit? That is so today, and uninspiring. It's not as innovative as the 20th Century. That century brought us so much: the Internet, the 21st Century, and so much more. This week, we cheer the yesteryear, with these now-pointless innovations.
 

THE WRISTWATCH

What is it: Stylish accessory worn on wrist. User manually sets time from secondary source, then hopes time is accurate.

Not affiliated with: Lance Armstrong's Livestrong Bracelets.

Advantages: "I'd love to tell you the advantages of a watch, but (glances at watch) look at the time, I have to run."

Disadvantages: Tan lines, assholes on the street asking you for the time.

As Seen in the Movies: Dr. No (1962), From Russia With Love (1963), Goldfinger (1964), Thunderball (1965), You Only Live Twice (1967), On Her Majesty's Secret Service (1969), Diamonds Are Forever (1971), Live and Let Die (1973), The Man With the Golden Gun (1974), The Spy Who Loved Me (1977), Moonraker (1979), For Your Eyes Only (1981), Octopussy (1983), View to a Kill (1985), The Living Daylights (1987), License to Kill (1989), GoldenEye (1995), Tomorrow Never Dies (1997), The World Is Not Enough (1999), Die Another Day (2002), Casino Royale (2006), Quantum of Solace (2008).

Web 2.0 connection: Swatch Internet Time.

Replaced by: Cellphones.

LIQUID PAPER

What is it: Popular white "correction liquid" that typists dabbed on typos. When dried, Liquid Paper provided a fresh white space to retype over. It's also a conversational ice-breaker among Baby Boomers because the inventor was the mother of a member of The Monkees.

Not affiliated with: Booze, aka "liquid courage."

Advantages: Saved typists from retyping entire page.

Disadvantages: Gums up typewriters. Won't get you as high as paint thinner.

As Seen in the Movies: Nine to Five (1980), Things to Do in Denver When You're Dead (1995).

Web 2.0 connection: Typos could be revealed by scratching dried Liquid Paper, much like deleted office emails can be revealed by vindictive IT contractors.

Replaced by: Backspace button.

AUTOMOBILE CIGARETTE LIGHTER

What is it: Tiny metal cylinder connected to automobile dashboard. When its exterior plastic button is pressed, the interior coil heats up. When ready, the button pops out, allowing motorists to safely light cigarettes.

Advantages: Burn backseat drivers.

Disadvantages: Circular slot now used for automobile accessories, like phone chargers.

As Seen in the Movies: Blues Brothers (1980), Blues Brothers 2000 (1998).

Web 2.0 connection: iPhone Rock Lighter app.

Replaced by: USB nodule, anti-smoking fascists.